Grass

This is a view you don't see in Beijing. I see this every day.

A year ago I landed in Beijing, China. Before then I had stepped foot on the soil of two countries: Canada (my home and native land) and the United States. Since then I have stumbled through China, Vietnam, Cambodia, and Spain (a bit of a detour).

I chose not to renew my contract at the school despite being welcome to do so. I wanted to review my options and pursue other avenues. I arrived back in New Brunswick at the end of June with relief and joy. The pollution was not oppressive and I could see stars in the sky. It was great.

I went camping and bounced around from city to town for a couple weeks re-uniting with folks I hadn't seen in a long time. I hosted a great storytelling event at the Dooryard Arts Festival (the recording of this event will be available...hopefully soon). I have began writing and work on several projects from a novel to a screenplay to a new website(s) to a non-fiction memoir/how-to and more.

Quite productive.

Then I saw the status updates. Everyone I worked with last year were announcing their impending returns to the urban sprawl of Beijing. They were prepping their classrooms and getting ready for the year and the slew of new students. I wondered if I made a mistake.

This was unavoidable. We tend to build up the alternative options or the choices we didn't make in our minds and calculate the what-ifs. I found myself thinking that maybe the grass was greener on the other side.

Now, in a literal sense this is not true. The grass is definitely more lush in New Brunswick than in Beijing. They both have their pros and cons.

Ability to collaborate with my writing partner (Canada)
Travel opportunities (China)
Career opportunities...aka steady paycheck (China)
Air quality! (Canada)
Independence (China)
Food (China)
Family (Canada)
Car availability (Canada)
Live sports (Canada...well, I can watch the games live in the mornings in China but no beer)

I've been reading more, too.

There are more. I have friends in both places so no matter what I miss people. What I need to be sure to do is not speak or act in definite terms. I may have expressed a notion that I would never return to China or never teach again. This is not accurate, and if I had expressed that it was a mistake. Who knows what the future holds? All I know for certain is that I need to constantly be changing. I cannot settle for the same routine.

I have my projects on the go...I feel good...but there's still a nagging thought that I need to run out the door and back into the wild smoggy yonder. I imagine this may become magnified after the first snowfall and I'm out shoveling for two hours. I love mowing lawns...shoveling snow is the worst thing.

Also, this will likely be the last post on this blog other than to direct you to my new location in conjunction with a bit larger project.

Thanks for reading. Go outside. Put your phone away. Read something interesting.